WHY?

Why does Kav abuse his Spiderman?

Well, why shouldn’t I? It’s not like Spidey has more positive things to do around the office. Plus, I didn’t make him do all those stuff, ya know. He did it all by himself, I just caught him in the act. I should say his libido is very high. Usually he sits there at the corner pretending we ain’t there. Sheeesh. Lot’s of “respect” for his co-workers. Asshole Spidey.

 

Why the excessive use of foul language in Kav’s Kollage? Is it your usual way of talking or just to spice up Kav’s Kollage?

It’s just me. I like to fucking say whatever the fuck I want. I cuss day and night, and it doesn’t make me a lesser person. So what if the blog is littered with fuck, bitch, shit, asshole, and bastard? It just adds some more flavour and spice to the whole content. Vulgarities emphasize a point more, in a hard lined way. So ease off my fucking back, will ya? At least my grammar is well above some other people.

 

Why does Kav have more visitors than Dante has?

This is simple. Bro, you gotta do more posts. Not once a fortnight. Peace.

 

Why is Dante such a smart guy?

This is also another easy question. It’s so obvious that Dante got his wide knowledge by hanging out with Kav each time they were in the lecture halls and seminar rooms together at university. Dante used to pry whatever information he wants from Kav while they both are not paying attention to the nonsense that some lecturers were blabbering out in front. Dante owes Kav. A beer. Maybe two.

 

Why did pretty girls elude Kav and Dante back in Univ?

No idea there. Perhaps the look of us reminded them of Dan Aykroyd and Tom Hanks from Dragnet. Nowadays Kav eludes girls for fear of making himself look like The Dork Knight.

 

Why Kav doesn’t have a girl?

Coz a mean, crazy girl screwed with me once, and I am very wary of falling for another one and making the same mistake again. Then again, Kav is now on the hunt for the perfect woman for him, now that he’s grown up (and sideways) a little. Problem is, I can’t seem to meet someone who simply can make me laugh a lot and be a good conversationist. Kav is tired of being the funny man all the time. By the way, Kav is still young. Turning 24 this October. ***presents presents presents***

 

Why is Kav an online pirate?

Coz I pay RM 60 per month to download a shitload of music, movies, comics, and porn from Torrents. Averaging to around about 80 GB per month. I believe that the internet is a place of freedom and everything must have equal share of distribution. Plus Malaysia’s multimedia laws are a big joke.

 

Why does Kav think about Elvis?

Elvis is alive and well. He lives in the jungles of North America and wears a big monkey suit as a disguise. Nowadays he calls himself Bigfoot and poses for rare photographs in the most awkward ways. I guess drugs are bad for you after all. He even went over to Canada and publicised himself with the glamour name of “Sasquatch”. Once he was in Tibet to meet the Dalai Lama and the people around the snowy mountains called him Yeti, which means “Dead Rocker from the Land of Grace”.

 

Why does Kav write nonsensical but interesting articles?

I do write about many other topics with a specific story to tell, but what is the point of being the same with everyone else? Being different is what I am. I am always thinking in different ways when it comes to regular stuff. This is my pride. Being different makes it interesting. Nonsensical articles are different, thus they are interesting to read.

 

Why doesn’t Kav write socio-political articles?

Even though I do write plenty of nonsense, it doesn’t actually seem to be nonsense when you look at it from a different angle. It’s just a different way to tell them, albeit with a little more sarcasm, dark humour and profanities. Whatever topic I write about, it has to be in my personal style. My socio-political articles are laced with humour and double-meanings. I’m no two-bit copy-paste “blogger”. I have my own genre. It’s called Pseudo-Nonsense. You have socio-political blogs, photoblogs, personal blogs, lifestyle blogs, and stuff like that. Introducing the Pseudo-Nonsense genre. Read it and weep.

 

Why did Kav think that the Mis-Information Minister pissed in his cabinet colleagues’ drinks?

What else could’ve been the reason for sending out a guy to embarrass himself in public with his horrible saliva-froth-on-the-corners-of-the-mouth skills? That had to be the grossest moment in Malaysian political history. Plus, on a personal note, I think the dude needed more education to understand simple questions. Ooops, sorry, the Education Minister went out to sharpen his keris, thus being unavailable for help.

 

Why did Kav ask Dante to give him questions for his blog?

Coz Kav is busy dozing off and has no coherent thought of what the fuck should he be posting in his blog.